PLEASE DON'T..!!!!!!

By cardenitas
Written January 25, 2015
Really? Rob Zombie still think this kind of crap is scary? Is so bad and ridiculous that is kind of funny. Please don't waste your money....!!!!!
9 out of 18 found this helpful. Did you?

LORDS OF SALEM SUCKED!!!(Not for KIDS or ANYONE!!)

By dw1215
Written April 21, 2013
Another excuse for Zombie to think we all want to see his wife naked or semi naked throughout the entire movie. Fine if making a porno, but this movie truely was below a "B" movie. A piece of trash that dragged on. Only 4 people dared to view it while I was there and all of us got up saying, OUT LOUD, "WOW THAT REALLY SUCKED". His trashing of Christianity beliefs while parading around a group of old saggy women naked head to toe, was more horriffic than the premise of the movie itself. Watching Sheri be a well versed crackhead, and waking up face down naked or with elastic waist shorts down around her aging butt, for no apparent reason other than when she sleeps her clothes just mysteriously fall off, was like aluminum foil on old teeth fillings... Aluminum foil has many good uses, just none worthy of speaking of inside your own mouth... the mix of bad animation and neon signs and neon DILDOS In Satans Court was just a touch of the worthlessness that made this "film" unwatchable CRAP!
8 out of 14 found this helpful. Did you?

TLoS

By harryjamespotter
Written October 28, 2014
this film is a slow burn, so don't go to it expecting to get a fast paced Slasher movie. it's eerie & heavy with symbolic imagery; much like the grindhouse Satanic Horror movies from the '70's. anyone who has seen The Shining, The Exorcist & Rosemary's Baby will pick-up on the nods to each. some people will dismiss this as a chaotic mess, but it's clear what Rob's vision was & he puts it on the screen & very well, i think. again, check your expectations at the door: don't expect the goofy camp of House of 1,000 Corpses, the sheer brutality of The Devil's Rejects & definitely not the stab-a-thon which was the Halloween movies; The Lords of Salem is its own animal. enjoy.
8 out of 13 found this helpful. Did you?

A swing.. and a miss.

By valiantboy
Written January 27, 2015
The movie started very slow and moved slow for the next few hours. very vivid imagery, he nailed the gore, but the movie was SLOW. The idea was awesome, the execution was lacking. House of 1000 corpses, awesome. Devils Rejects was phenominal, one of my favorite movies. All the other remakes have been spot on. Altho, i DID enjoy seeing Sherri Moon in very.. sheer outfits.. that was worth the price of admission!
8 out of 15 found this helpful. Did you?

Mind warp...

By josemangin
Written January 25, 2015
I'm still confused... but at the same time not really.. this is spacey Rob Zombie... very Satanic, which is cool... but it was really cloudy... i liked it.. but walked out not really sure what just happened... i tried to explain to wife afterwards and i was at a loss for words... love how Zombie pushes the limits of movies and the horror genre, but this one falls a little short... the music is killer, John 5 did an amazing job! as a fan of Rob you should see it to support him... but ya might leave in some crazy weird mind warp! but all in all glad to see the Devil so proudly displayed in the theatre! \m/
7 out of 9 found this helpful. Did you?