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Ridiculous! Talking rocks?

By ryanbtolman
Written September 07, 2014
I'm a pastor and I was looking forward to a Biblical account of Noah. It was promoted as such. Instead this is one of the worst movies I have seen. The talking rocks looked like transformers! There's nothing in the Bible about talking rocks as watchers! Also, I don't believe God wanted to extinguish the human race, why else would God instruct him to build an ark? The scene where Noah was determined to kill his grand daughters was horrific to me. I expected more from a movie with Russell Crowe and Anthony Hopkins. I was thoroughly disappointed and I want my money back.
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Noah - Worst Movie EVER

By timhawks
Written September 07, 2014
Just saw it in the early east coast showing a 7 PM EDT. We go to the movies every week. I knew it would be a dark movie even if it held true the Bible. BUT, the story line was so strange even if it had not been a Bible based story. But the rock angles that helped just got crazy. Worst acting ever plus the stowaway that ate all of the dinosaurs. Now we know that happened. I kept thinking it is so bad now its got to get better. It just got worst. Go see something else. Anything.
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By gmharmon1
Written September 07, 2014
I have seen a lot of bad movies in my life, but right now I cannot think of any that were worse than this piece of garbage. If I had to describe it, I think I would say it was a cross between Tranformers and Waterworld. We were ready to walk out after 15 minutes, but it was so ridiculous we kept waiting for Meagan Fox and Kevin Costner to make their cameos. The only thing worse than the acting was the story line. I guess if you want to get a glimpse inside the mind of an atheist, this is the movie to see. I think director Darren Aronofsky should have tried reading a few verses of the old testament or at least have hired someone on his staff who had. Don't waste your time or money.
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If there was a lower rating, I would use it

By mjustus2
Written April 02, 2014
I almost don't have the words for exactly how bad this is. If you are a hunter, or just not vegan, not for you. The movie depicts the evil children of Cain eating meat, while the decent children of Seth (Noah) don't. In this film Noah thought God wanted all humans to cease, including those in the ark, after the innocent animals were saved, Noah used hallucinogens, the sin of Fallen Angels was helping mankind. Other sins? Destroying forests or picking flowers. If you don't think "decent" Noah believed baby girls should be murdered at birth, including his grandkids, so they would not reproduce, not for you. Any semblance to the Bible may be pure coincidence. If you want a musical score, there is none. If you want angels transformed into rock monsters and building the ark, it still isn't worth it. Too violent for young children. Don't waste your money or time. The person with me wanted to walk out and said he wished he knew how much I detested it, as he would have done so.
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By wjfoster
Written September 07, 2014
Worst waste of admission since "The Lone Ranger". Jerky cinematography at times, terrible music, uneven storyline, sluggish plot that was hard to follow. Terrible attempt even for a science fiction movie. I see dozens of movies a year...but on this one, I would have been better off staying home and poking needles in my eyes.
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