You'd think by now Rachel McAdams would know: time travelers always leave you. Sometimes they leave you for another decade, as Henry (Eric Bana) did in The Time Traveler’s Wife; sometimes they leave you for another decade and woman, as Gil (Owen Wilson) did in Midnight in Paris. Big shocker: she’s at it again this week in About Time, a romantic comedy about a man she's in love with who, you guessed it, has the ability to travel through time. If time travelers are your type, you've basically got the worst complex ever.
We can only hope About Time's traveler will stick around for Miss McAdams, but in the meantime, here are the guys she's dated on-screen who don't bend space and time, and which of them she ought to end up with.
The Hot Chick
Sure Jessica (McAdams) and Billy (Matthew Lawrence) are the hottest couple in high school… but we all know what happens to people who peak in hotness at the age of 17—by the time they’re 26, at least one of them will look like they’re 40 and will already have been divorced twice.
Queen bee Regina George (McAdams) just can’t decide who she wants: Aaron or Shane (Jonathan Bennett, Diego Klattenhoff). I mean, they’re both totally hot, but Shane’s not too bright and Aaron clearly struggles with math. The limit here does exist—and it’s neither of them.
Intricate and hilarious lies may serve up a lot of laughs, but they’re also the thing relationship nightmares are made of. Make John Beckwith (Owen Wilson) that funny guy you had a fling with to get back at your overbearing father and alcoholic mother… but DO NOT let him put a ring on it.
Technically there was some pretty heavy flirtation happening between Jackson (Cillian Murphy) and Lisa (McAdams) as they wait to board their flight… but then Jackson tried to kill her, and that, ladies, is a deal breaker.
Let’s be real, as a morning-show producer, Becky (McAdams) has no time to date anyone but her career.
While Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey Jr.) may be a handsome genius, he’s also an egotistical maniac who really just can’t when it comes to relationships. On top of all that, Irene (McAdams) isn’t really the dating type either.
After an accident puts Paige (McAdams) in an amnesia inducing coma, she must relearn to love her hot husband (Channing Tatum), whom she’s completely forgotten about. While it’s utterly unacceptable and unnatural to ever forget a face like Channing’s, his patience and perseverance are so noble that he is a total contender for McAdam’s on-screen heart.
I can hear the swoons echoing all over the Internet already. Sure, Noah (Ryan Gosling) is poor, but he’s determined to win the heart of McAdam’s Southern belle. And sure, she may forget all about him in her old age, but he’ll never leave her. Do I smell a winner?
I’d ask who y’all think is her best on-screen, non-time-traveling love, but I can pretty much assume The Notebook will reign supreme. Rachel, please just stay with Ryan. He loves you, and so do we.
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